How to build trust:Pace,pace,pace.

Last week we talked about job interviews and the concept of pacing.We agreed that in order to create rapport and trust between two or more persons it would be very helpful to engage in the act of pacing.....and we did some exercises with this as well - mostly by pacing body postures and breathing rythms.

By the way - over the weekend - I began to wonder if I am still in good rapport with my 1A students - or has the process of "losing" them inadvertently been started and would that mean that I - Jay - needed to go back and pace them and their needs?

In any case - today I brought a "gadget" to class in order to demonstrate the concept of pacing more clearly almost metaphorically and to give a few students a chance "to feel" what it is like to be in good rapport.Basically I handed them two flexible metal rods that are about three feet in length.There is a handle on the one end and some sort of wooden container box ( similar to the head of a medium size tobacco pipe ) on the other end.

The idea is to tranfer a small round ball from one of the wooden container box ( the provider ) into the other box ( the receiver ) - it sounds simple but since these rods are highly flexible they swing back and forth and need to be stabilized and brought closely together in harmony - to then try to successfully achieve the desired transfer.

I explained that the one person could be called the "teacher" - and the person on the receiving end would then be called the "student". ..and the ball would symbolize i.e. the grammar behind using do/does/did when asking certain questions in the present or past!! And it would take trust and rapport and closeness and some balance skills to bring the "ball" ( the grammar ) home into the "bucket" ( the student's brain ).......or as in our initial role playing exercise: how to pace the interviewer well enough to get that sought after job offer.

After we had played with the rods and I had done my explaining part - I was unsure ( and I still am ) if the students truly understood the concept I had intended to get across. ??